gratitude 30january14 forgiveness empowerment

i am rather amazed at my ability to meditate. it has taken me many months to achieve those few valued minutes that my mind goes quiet and i feel a sense of peace flow over me. in those precious minutes; i feel empowered. i focus on my breathing — breathing in light, love, positive and exhaling the dark, doubt, and fear. i repeat that pattern and those words. the inhale and exhale is soothing, the words calm and a part of me.

deep within i feel the healing of my spirit. it’s like peeling back the layers of an onion and the tears that come with that process. sometimes for no reason i have a good cry at the end of my meditation time. initially i tried to stifle that urge. in time i let the tears flow as they would demand. kind of like that saying “tears are the result of too much pressure on your heart.” over the years i now realize i never allowed a true healing of my hurt. i never allowed a complete forgiveness to take hold. i allowed a scab to form but i would continue to pick at it, leaving that wound open and raw. i believe you have to find that place that you say “no” to picking at the scabs. you have to allow the time it takes for a complete healing. i once wrote a writing called “rolling in shattered glass.” unknowing to myself at the time — it was an expression of my need to heal and not knowing how.

today i used my meditation time to focus on forgiveness. to not forgive is a horrible prison to lock yourself in. to forgive is to no longer give another that negative control in your life. forgiveness places you in a position of power. it keeps you centered. i meditate the feelings of anger and hurt into feelings of empathy and healing. as i write this i continue to keep in my mind that slow and deep rhythm of breathing. bringing the positive into me and the negative away.

today i am thankful for ..

  • the wonderful pleasures of a fireplace, internet, cable and heat
  • the beauty of a clear blue sky
  • my family and friends .. my heartbeats

my body may be shoveling and digging out my car from another snowfall, however, my mind is here ..

via pinterest.com

via pinterest.com

affectionately yours, Laura

 

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