My grandfather was an alcoholic. I have vivid memories of the way he looked drunk. The way he smelled. That distinct odor as the smell of liquor permeated from his pores. The look on my Granny’s face when “The special man” would make a delivery and he would put a paper bag containing a bottle in his pocket and head for his room. How Granny would keep me close to her during those times. I can hear Granny saying “Jim, drunk men tell no lies” when they would verbally spar back and forth. I didn’t understand it then, I do now.
I did some research on where this phrase came from. I discovered there are several varieties of it on the internet: “A drunk man tells a sober man’s thoughts” and “A drunk man tells no tales.” Dr. Thomas Kimball, who is the associate managing director of Texas Tech’s Center for the Study of Addiction and Recovery, told Forbes Magazine that alcohol certainly lowers people’s inhibitions, Thus, making someone drunk or high, lose the “filter” normally in place, to say what they are really thinking and feeling.
I could not find any specific scientific research to back up the hypothesis of “drunk men tell no lies.” However, there is my own personal experience that supports alcohol can make a person, myself included, do and say things they wouldn’t when sober. It would lead one to make the hypothesis “Drinking causes you to not only forget your true self, it can certainly bring forth the someone within you keep hidden.”
For me when something is said to me in a drunk stupor or I hear myself speak out while inebriated, my Granny’s words come back to haunt me. “Drunk men tell no lies.” I place added weight to the raw reality and I take extra caution to the honesty of the statements and place the weight of truth on its side. A sad testament of a childhood that learned life lessons too soon.
Today I am thankful for ..
- The gift of a friend who completed her life journey yesterday. Her kindness will always be remembered.
- The growing ability to not judge until all the facts are in — calming the emotions until the logic kicks in
- The anticipation and planning of a new home to look forward to
- My goals and bucket list for 2014
In some way try to pay if forward into the universe. A smile to someone without one is free. A cup of coffee to the person in line behind you $5. I believe that life is a big boomerang — what you put out, will be returned to you.
affectionately yours, Laura